This story brought a smile to my face over the Calais kids.

On a lighter note, these ‘children’ reminded me of that classic episode of Only Fools And Horses, in which Del enters one of Rodney’s old paintings in a competition and wins a holiday in Majorca.

When they get to the resort, Rodney discovers the competition was for under-14s and he has to pose as a teenage boy for the duration — enlisted in the Groovy Gang and accosted by a besotted Bros fan.

Eventually, he snaps at Del: ‘Thanks to your general wally-ness, I am now a 26-year-old man who has just come second in a skateboard race!’



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